Craftastrope

Preferably made of polymer.

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Originally published at Craftastrophe. You can comment here or there.

OMG aren’t these hilarious and adorable?  I kinda want to get one for my husband.

More after the jump!

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Originally published at Craftastrophe. You can comment here or there.

perfect gift for people in the medical field, science nerd, or people who like interesting clothing. the black tunic is made by me with different colored and textured fabric used in patchwork to represent the different human organs and rib cage. this is perfect for wearing with leggings, jeans, or if you’re really daring, by itself!

ALL HAND MADE AND DESIGNED BY ME! NO TW0 SHIRTS ARE EXACTLY THE SAME. please specify a size.

Interesting? Yes.

Daring? Sure.

Something else the nerds need to be picked on for? Not really.

P.S. Call me old-school, but the makeup totally ruins this outfit. It looks like her eye shadow is actually that neon zinc we used to put on our noses.

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Rock out with your cock out.

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All I see is lactating nipples. I can’t help it. They’re just staring at me.

*cringe*

I can’t help but want to reach through the screen and pop each and every one of those lactating nipples zits. On the pumpkin. Zitty pumpkin. Ugh.

Also? WTF!?

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Originally published at Craftastrophe. You can comment here or there.

and EYE know what you’ve been doing with that hand.

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Originally published at Craftastrophe. You can comment here or there.

From the listing:

I found a blue hand painted reindeer at a thrift store… I bought it, broke it and added a used 22 bullet, some smashed waterford crystal glassware, a sea gull carcass, a little moon man, fake wolf eyes and a couple of sharks teeth to it using ‘the clay’.

Oh yeah?  Well it looks nothing like a reindeer and a lot like years of therapy ahead, dude.  Oh wait…what is that?

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I don’t know guys, she looks more like a squatter.  In a crack den.  Who hasn’t bathed in 8 months.

Actually, up close, she looks like that one chick from Jersey Shore:  JWOWW:

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I’m not sure which part of this is “Girls’ Best Friend.”

Would it be the giant arm she’s sporting?  Would it be the unidentifiable creature trailing behind her?

Wait. Her?  There’s no way that head belongs on a chick.  Is that Drew Carey?

I’m sticking to diamonds, kthxbai.

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Originally published at Craftastrophe. You can comment here or there.

Using credit to pay for Christmas?  Guess what you’ll be doing in January and February?  At least you won’t be alone!

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I dunno guys, she kinda just falls flat.  And her vagina is a little to the left, to the left, everything she own in a box to the left.

My apologies to Beyonce.

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Originally published at Craftastrophe. You can comment here or there.

Thanks Kim!

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As if the title wasn’t long enough.

Are you ready for this?

Okay.

Aaaannnnd.

Go!

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Sand totally counts as a crafting medium, so you know.

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Originally published at Craftastrophe. You can comment here or there.

I don’t get it.

I mean, when I think of sunsets, I think of this:

I’m sure you do too.

In fact, I’m willing to bet the following images are the polar opposite of what you envision when you hear the word “sunset.”

NSFW ahead.

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Originally published at Craftastrophe. You can comment here or there.

Yes Mama, they are Dirty Pillows.

For 95.00, I’ll take two.

One teabag and one butt sex. Oh wait!

Yes! It’s a two-fer.

Threesome FTW!

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From the listing:

I’m read for sleeping over, for romantic dinners, for looking after your pet cat when you go down to your parents place for the weekend. I’m ready to be your one and only lover!

Fan of Jersey Shore? If not, too bad because I was totally going to send you one of these cards for Christmas.

Gawd, I love me some guidos and guidettes. (Don’t be a hater, that’s what those crazy kids call themselves.)

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From the listing:

This is a Ouija Board I have created as a wall hanging. Please note the planchette is affixed to the piece, so is not usable in the normal sense of ouija board use. The piece measures approximately 19″ x 13″ x 1″. All the inside componenets used in constructing this board are computer parts. The planchette is a modified mouse, the letters and numbers are keyboard keys, and the other items are wires, pieces of circuit boards, capacitors, etc. The background is painted a light greenish yellow. All of this was then covered with a thick layer of epoxy, giving it a smooth and glossy finish. It has a very “distressed” looked to it. A wire is mounted on the reverse side for mounting.

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Heh. Sorry.  Couldn’t resist.  It’s cute though, huh?

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Originally published at Craftastrophe. You can comment here or there.

Ever take a really great picture of your pet only to realize their chocolate starfish brown eye butt hole was front and centre?

Then this is the product for you!

Because, like Dooce’s dear puppers, Chuck… all our fur babies could use a little cover up once and a while, couldn’t they?

Now, if they could keep my dog from wiping her ass on the carpet.

Thanks Karen!!

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Originally published at Craftastrophe. You can comment here or there.