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Apr. 20th, 2011

Just me and my messed-up cat pictures

I think I am the lone Craftastrophe holdout. Everyone else has abandoned the sinking ship like rats.

Leaving me here with the cats. Scary, terrifying, horrible cats:

Terrifying cats Just me and my messed up cat picturesI don’t often offer my original paintings here at Etsy, so this is a rarity! Yes, this is the actual ORIGINAL painting itself – not a print or reproduction of any kind.

Why is this happening to me?

{Source} Yours for $7200. Bargain.

Suebob wants Calgon to take her away.

share save 171 16 Just me and my messed up cat pictures

Originally published at Craftastrophe. You can comment here or there.

Apr. 14th, 2011

Puddle the Easter Horror

We all know bad children get coal in their stockings at Christmas. What do bad children get at Easter?

Puddle Puddle the Easter HorrorBehold Puddle the Funky Gypsy Fiber Art Bunny. Hm. Looks more like Puddle the Mutant Horror Movie Mexican Wrestling Luchadora Bunny to me. In any case, scary as hell.

THAT will teach them to be good, right?

What can you say about Puddle..? She is truly a unique little creation…Puddle simply adores our pet dog Pepper and will follow him around – much to his horror…Pepper reckons she is a really fierce watchdog…not a bunny lover!! Puddle sits and pines away by our window wondering why the other bunnies down come by to visit

{Source} Yours for only $180.

Suebob is baffled.

share save 171 16 Puddle the Easter Horror

Originally published at Craftastrophe. You can comment here or there.

Apr. 10th, 2011

Don’t Remind Me

There are some things that go without saying. There are others that you shouldn’t say because you don’t want to draw attention to them. Observe:

Pees necklace Dont Remind Me

Snotty Handkerchief Dont Remind Me

And you want to remind people of these facts why, exactly?

{Source} Necklace

{Source} Handkerchief

Suebob doesn’t like to think about it.

share save 171 16 Dont Remind Me

Originally published at Craftastrophe. You can comment here or there.

Apr. 5th, 2011

An NSFW Farewell

This will be my last contribution to this lovely blog.  And for my final Craftastrophe post, I of course wanted to find something good.  Something indicative of my experience as both a Craftastrophe writer, and reader.  Something that would celebrate the site, and all its disturbing, unnecessary, and ridiculously poorly made crafts.

ohnocensored

What could Grandma be holding?

Is it a faceless rabbit?

A tampon wind chime?

Maybe a bloody onesie?

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Read the rest of this entry »

Originally published at Craftastrophe. You can comment here or there.

Mar. 31st, 2011

For the minimalist

I KNOW it has to be hard to carve a stone ball. It must have taken you a long, long time to carve a stone ball.

Stone ball It started as an ordinary rock. Thousands of thunks later, it takes shape as a glorious globe. One wrong thunk of the stone mason’s hammer and it becomes a dud, broken in half. Inspired by the mysterious stone spheres of Costa Rica, Las Bolas. Energy, exercise, meditation, contemplation, striation appreciation… what will you use your stone ball for?

Thank you for having the looney idea to turn a stone into a sphere and taking the time to do it. I, however, feel no compulsion to spend $425 on it. Thank you, and goodnight.

{Source}

Suebob is tired of balls and the people who have them.

 

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Originally published at Craftastrophe. You can comment here or there.

Mar. 29th, 2011

Waiter, There’s a Hair In My…Oh.

il 570xN.140502878 Waiter, Theres a Hair In My...Oh.

 

Just what you’ve always wanted–the inconvenience of not one but MANY hairs in your coffee for just $50!  I’m amazed more espressos don’t come with toupes.

{source}

Renee feels like a hair cut.

share save 171 16 Waiter, Theres a Hair In My...Oh.

Originally published at Craftastrophe. You can comment here or there.

Mar. 25th, 2011

Heffalumps and Lady Lumps

Here in the south, we have two definitions for being sans clothing. One of which is of course naked, which means that you have no clothes on. The other is nekkid, which means you have no clothes on and you are up to something.

Obviously, she is nekkid……

il 570xN.181609135
il 570xN.181609233

I’ve been naked and nekkid on many an occasion, and on neither have I found myself riding an elephant. Nor a tree limb. Some of the men I’ve been nekkid with would probably disagree with those statements. Bygones.

All I know is, she is clearly up to something, and girlfriend is looking fierce. She should be ….. for only $5,000 she can be yours. Along with the elephant.

You gotta find your own tree limb though.

{source}

Kim prefers to be nekkid.

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Originally published at Craftastrophe. You can comment here or there.

Mar. 23rd, 2011

You’ve got a little spinach in your earring

earringteeth 300x224

and now we know what the tooth fairy does with all of those teeth.  Also, ew.

 

Source

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Originally published at Craftastrophe. You can comment here or there.

Mar. 22nd, 2011

NSF…Oh, Wait, Those Are Eggs.

il 570xN.125703880 NSF...Oh, Wait, Those Are Eggs.

 

Unfortunate egg placement FTW.

{source}

Renee also makes things.

share save 171 16 NSF...Oh, Wait, Those Are Eggs.

Originally published at Craftastrophe. You can comment here or there.

Mar. 16th, 2011

You take the good, you take the bad…

We are used to seeing some REALLY awful things, here at Craftastrophe. It’s kind of our thing. However, sometimes in the search for crap, you come up with a rose.

daisywatercolor1 278x300
Or in this case, a daisy. How beautiful is THAT?

Source

flutter likes The Facts of Life

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Originally published at Craftastrophe. You can comment here or there.

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